Monday, January 23, 2017

When You Didn't Jack as hard as you thought you did...

    It has been over two months since Blizzcon and my diet had pretty much fallen off the rails until about 2 weeks ago. While I continued to log my food and go to the gym, I did not try very hard to hit my calorie goals for the day every day. I needed a bit of a break from the hard core dieting and felt I deserved it as I had reached the lowest weight I had been in well over 3 years. The only issue is that I let my little "break" become two months of lax dieting practices.
    I became incredibly depressed when I got on the scale and had gone from my lowest weight (in recent years) of 124 back up to 129. I gained 5 lbs in two months. I almost felt sick. How could I let this happen? Why did I spend the last 8 months working my ass off (literally) to backslide a full 5 lbs? This is probably the point where I could have just said fuck it and continued to eat how I was and only working out twice a week, however this is not what I want. So, how do I find the motivation to get back on the horse?
    I took a step back and reminded myself of where I had been. 3 years ago, I weighed 150 lbs. The heaviest I had ever been in my life. I was unhealthy and did not work out ever. I decided that day to start going to the gym. I started with just exercise as the main means to loose weight. From 2014 to 2015 I really didn't lose any weight. I had been working out for months with no result. I decided to boost my workouts from personal training with random cardio days to a more structured twice a week cardio/weight training class. I still didn't want to diet but after about 3 months with no weight loss I was frustrated. Maybe it really is 75% what you eat and 25% at the gym. This is when I started the full blown dieting and tracking from my previous post.
    I was mostly successful with keeping my calorie goals under what I was burning even though I still wouldn't eat vegetables.  Over 8 months I watched my clothes get bigger and the scale numbers get smaller. I felt really motivated and was seeing actual results. Tracking it visually was also a huge motivator to keep me going. I feel this is probably why when I had stopped visually tracking each month, I wasn't paying as close attention to my eating habits.
    So after two weeks of being "back on the horse" I haven't lost weight. I am hovering between 127 - 129 lbs depending on the day. I always weigh myself first thing in the morning to eliminate any daytime eating and drinking fluctuations. I also started visually tracking my weekly totals as I had been previously. I think after almost a year I might be willing to entertain vegetables. I don't feel like I will ever feel full by continuing to eat minuscule portions of pasta for almost every meal. I am starting to get used to feeling hungry often but I know I can't live the rest of my life being constantly hungry. This is a time I truly wish I wasn't such a picky eater. I really only like carbs of any kind and dairy. Cheese is life. Starting small is going to be the key. Eat a vegetable I can tolerate at first and go from there. I'll get back to you on how well that works in a few months. If anyone has good recipes for picky vegetable eaters I'm all ears.
    So I'll leave you with a parting reminder that even if you haven't reached your goals doesn't mean you aren't making progress. At least you are trying.

- Basic B

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